Funny birthday quotes aren't hard to find these days, because when it comes to getting older, there's always something to joke about. Having a sense of humor about your age can help to make birthdays a little easier to stomach. For example, here are some funny birthday quotes spoken by well-known comedians and celebrities:

Funny Birthday Quotes

Funny Birthday Quotes

Funny Birthday Quotes

Funny Birthday Quotes

Funny Birthday Quotes

Funny Birthday Quotes

"There is still no cure for the common birthday." 
- John Glenn

"Inside every older person is a younger person - wondering what the heck happened." 
- Cora Harvey Armstrong

"Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair." 
- Sam Ewing

"Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician." 
- Anonymous

"Growing old is like being increasingly penalized for a crime you have not committed." 
- Anthony Powell

"A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age." 
- Robert Frost

"When I turned two I was really anxious, because I'd doubled my age in a year. I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I'm five I'll be 64." 
- Anonymous

"Last week the candle factory burned down. Everyone just stood around and sang Happy Birthday." 
- Stephen Wright

"When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it happened or not." 
- Mark Twain

"I'm at an age when my back goes out more than I do." 
- Phyllis Diller

"In dog years, I'm dead." 
- Anonymous

"I wake up every morning at nine and grab for the morning paper. Then I look at the obituary page. If my name is not on it, I get up." 
- Harry Hershfield

"A stockbroker urged me to buy a stock that would triple its value every year. I told him, ''At my age, I don't even buy green bananas." 
- Claude D. Pepper

Of course, not everyone dreads getting older. Many people choose to put a positive spin on the inevitable passing of time. Check out these inspirational funny birthday quotes:

"It is not how old you are, but how you are old." 
- Marie Dressler

"Some people, no matter how old they get, never lose their beauty - they merely move it from their faces into their hearts." 
- Martin Buxbaum

"Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once." 
- Dave Barry

"Youth is a disease from which we all recover." 
- Dorothy Fulheim

"You're not 40, you're eighteen with 22 years experience." 
- Anonymous

"To me, old age is always 15 years older than I am." 
- Bernard Baruch

No matter how you choose to see it, birthdays are a great opportunity to have a few laughs and make peace with getting older. And funny birthday quotes sure make that easier to do!

Some of the most quotable birthday sayings have been hand-picked for our birthday poems web pages. We want to share these poignant quotes with you, so that you can choose the one that best suits the sentiment you want to get across.

For your mom's birthday, there are quotes that express the love and care of motherhood throughout the ages.  Let her know how much her hard work and sacrifice and unconditional love mean to you.  Quotes are a wonderful addition to our birthday poems - try writing them in beautiful calligraphy and slipping them into a birthday card.

To honor a father who has been a tremendous influence in your life, whose hard work and wisdom have helped shape you into the person you are today, show him how much you appreciate all his love by adding appropriate birthday quotes to a card or gift on his special day.

Let your beloved know that he or she is always on your mind, and that this special person is so important and central to your life.  Birthday quotes are a wonderful extra touch that says you are thinking of them and that you put time and effort into finding a way to honor your lives together.

Birthday Quotes

Birthday Quotes

Birthday Quotes

Birthday Quotes

Birthday Quotes

Birthday Quotes

Birthday Quotes

Birthday Quotes

Birthdays are such important events - every year, each person has a day that is uniquely for them, and it is wonderful to be able to take that opportunity to show them how they are such a big part of your life.  Birthday quotes can be framed and kept as treasured keepsakes for many years to come.

Milestone birthdays, like a 50th or 60th, are especially good times to commemorate the accomplishments of the past and salute the ones you love with best wishes for the future.

The following birthday quotes are especially meaningful:

To me, fair friend, you never can be old, 
For as you were when first your eye I eye'd, 
Such seems your beauty still. -William Shakespeare

What a beautiful way to tell the one you love the most that their youth and loveliness never fades in your eyes.  Or how about the following words of wisdom from one of the greatest comediennes of all time:

The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age. - Lucille Ball

These and many other birthday quotes ring as true today as the day they were spoken or written, whether last year or three thousand years ago. Birthday quotes not only give us a connection to our loved ones, they connect us to all those who have gone before; they let us know that, no matter how many ages pass, people remain essentially the same.

Make this birthday a celebration to remember.  Commemorate the special event with thoughtful or humorous birthday quotes that they will never forget.